“Evidently it is not true that lovers have to be of exactly equal height or equal intelligence or equal sensitivity to music. The equality I speak of is not an equality on some common scale against which they are both measured; it is, so to speak, an equality where each is the scale for the other. A large part of love is a recognition of this equality, a recognition that the other’s existence as as valid as one’s own, a recognition that the other does not exist simply in function of you, but is there equally. It is an equality of value in some ultimate and irreducible sense of value. One of the things that makes this hard to express is that it involves a certain kind of circularity: the equality demanded by love is an equality that is best defined by love. The idea of love and the the idea of this sort of equality are simultaneous. The law can enshrine equality just when it expresses solidarity in love.”
–Herbert McCabe, God Matters (New York: Continuum, 2005), 16.